To commemorate Ramadan, MuslimMarine.org and Vets for American Ideals launched the “29 for 29 Ramadan Initiative,” or #29for29, a project bringing 29 U.S. military veterans to the homes of American Muslim families across the United States during the month-long holiday. We believe veterans are uniquely positioned to bring communities together: at a time when 62 percent of Americans say they have never met someone of the Muslim faith, the project will educate, entertain, and ultimately unify Americans from different walks of life. Read more about the initiative here.

We talked to U.S. Air Force veteran and VFAI leader Gretchen Klingler about her #29for29 experience in Columbus, Ohio.

Why did you decide to participate in this initiative? What were you hoping to get out of it?

I decided to participate in this initiative because I am passionate about learning about others that are different from me, especially in matters of faith.  One of the most important tenants of being American is the right to freely practice (or not practice) religion. However, we rarely have the opportunity to be exposed to the inner workings of faiths other than our own. Even having served with Muslim Americans, and conducting academic research within the community, I am acutely aware that even within Islam, there is a range of practice and belief from secular to conservative, and my research tends to only expose me to individuals from one country.  By participating in the 29 for 29 Ramadan Initiative, I was hoping to broaden my understanding of the ways Islam is practiced. Lastly, I hoped to be a part of an initiative that demonstrates solidarity between veterans and Muslim Americans.

What did you know about the Muslim faith? What were you expecting before you arrived?

My academic research gives me the chance to interact with the Muslim community here in Central Ohio.  I am studying Modern Standard Arabic at The Ohio State University, have another major in Anthropology, and am working towards a minor in Middle Eastern Studies.  So, I am familiar with Islam, and am aware of its diversity of practices. Despite being exposed to Islam both in and out of the Air Force, I had never spent an extended amount of time with a Pakistani family.  This was new to me, and I wasn't sure how the culture might differ from other Arab cultures. I was hopeful that I could rely on my cultural understanding of Islam to be respectful and open-minded.

In what ways did the experience confirm or transform your understandings?

For those who have had the opportunity to visit a Muslim family, you know that Islamic hospitality is one of the warmest experiences you could have in your life, and this experience was no different.  I chose to participate in the fast for the day, and I was offered something to drink as soon as I arrived. My host introduced me to the entire family, offered me a seat, and immediately engaged in conversation. When we went to mosque, I was welcomed with hugs and polite curiosity.  I was told about the sequence of the service, and invited to break fast with other women at iftar dinner. My hosts gave me a tour, and I was encouraged to take photographs of my experience. 

When we returned home for the evening, my hosts stayed up late to chat with me. They brought a pitcher of water to my room so I could hydrate after fasting, and offered towels and a choice of three beds. They continuously asked me if I was comfortable or needed anything. I was warmly welcomed throughout the entire visit, right down to the last moment of my stay, when I was offered to stay for lunch (since some family members could not fast for health reasons). 

What surprised you about the visit?

I was a little bit surprised that my host and his wife live with his parents, and that his wife is Canadian!  While it's rare for a young adult in the United States to continue living with his or her parents after marriage, it's really not uncommon at all for families from other cultures to live with parents for several years while the newlywed couple becomes established.  In the Middle East and in Central Asia, it's often expected that a son and his new wife will live with the parents, and sometimes those cultural traditions remain with families when they come to the United States.  I think it's a nice way for families to be supportive of their children as they continue to grow as an extended family. I was grateful to meet my host's parents and siblings.

What was your favorite part about the whole experience?

My favorite part of my #29for29 Ramadan experience was visiting the mosque.  No one looked at me funny (I didn't expect them to, but you never know as a stranger), yet people were interested in me. No one questioned why I was there, they simply welcomed me into their community. I felt completely at home with the women and enjoyed my fellowship with them.

What did you learn?

I learned a lot about my new friends, their faith, and picked up on things I didn't know about Islam before.  Even though I work and do research with Muslims, this was a great opportunity for me to deepened my understanding of how others practice the faith and the relationship between culture and religious practice. I really enjoyed it!

What might other Americans learn from your experience?

We must not generalize an entire group of people based on where they come from, and that is the message I'd like to share. Unfortunately, some people suggest that immigrants and refugees are not contributing members of society. Yet, my host family is full of doctors and medical residents -- all humble, hardworking Americans. My host's father was not participating in Ramadan due to health reasons, but even if he could, he wouldn't be participating because his job as an Emergency Room doctor requires him to be fully alert at any hour.

What do you want Americans to know about their Muslim neighbors?

In the United States, we often aren't given an education on religious differences, it's often something we have to seek out on our own. 

Some non-Muslim people believe that the practice of fasting during Ramadan is cruel or like a punishment - but Muslims look forward to Ramadan as a time to get closer to God, and those who cannot participate are often saddened. Sure, Ramadan is exhausting, but it is also rejuvenating. The iftar meal at the end of the day is a community celebration - how many of us get to celebrate every night for a month?

For those who have Muslim neighbors but are hesitant to reach out: I'd encourage you to look past your apprehension about faith differences and see that your Muslim neighbors are just like you. Get to know them!  Ask questions (in a respectful way) about things you don't understand, and give yourself an opportunity to learn more about your community.  Just like Judaism and Christianity, there are many different ways of practicing Islam.  For example, in Christianity, some churches only read from the King James version of the Bible, some wear bonnets or prayer caps, and in some women must wear skirts and dresses. Some churches use contemporary music while others only sing traditional hymns. The same variety is reflected in Islam. Take the time to learn for yourself from a Muslim, and better yet, talk to more than one person. The more we learn about our neighbors, the more we strengthen our communities.

And lastly, if someone invites you to their mosque for Ramadan events (or any event) - GO!  Think of it as an opportunity to see for yourself how Muslims practice their faith, and enjoy the hospitality that Muslims offer their guests.  Go especially if are unfamiliar with Islam.  You will soon find out why my Muslim neighbors are some of my dearest friends.